Tuesday, February 5, 2019

I Do It For Them

I don't know if anyone will ever read this, perhaps I'm just writing this to myself. I'm a special education teacher, and I love my job, have loved my job from he beginning. And maybe I hope you will read this. Maybe I hope someday, you'll see my post and we can start understanding each other.

I didn't have to work where I am now. I had a job offer at another district that paid more money. I could have taken. Not really sure where I'd be right now if I had, but I definitely would be making more money. That should tell you that I didn't take this job for the money. It was never about making money for me. I had stumbled into a profession that had called to me. So what could have been better than a higher paying job?

Because I got to meet them. My students.

After my interview I was asked back to do a lesson with the classroom. I was so nervous that day, and sick. I had been so sick. I took a bunch of medicine and off I went. I couldn't afford to miss any days at my student teaching job. I had already taken them to go to my sisters wedding. So there I was, low grade fever, headache, sore throat, loss voice. I felt miserable. But I came anyway for so many reasons that day, I came anyway. And that's where I met them. These sweet kids that somehow, despite how sick I was and how awful I felt, I made them smile, and laugh, they made me smile and laugh too. I saw their faces, learned their names. Suddenly I was just like grinch, my heart had grown ten sizes bigger.

And I knew instantly that I was supposed to be there, with those kids.

What I do is not easy. And until you've been a special education teacher, it's easy to say so otherwise. But I don't do it for the money. I don't do it because I have nothing else to do.

I do it for them.